Eating Green; Cookbook Review of More-With-Less

http://www.worldcommunitycookbook.org/more/about.html

My friend Ashley recommended this cookbook, More-With-Less by Doris Janzen Longacre, to me last year. I didn't know what to expect, but upon flipping through the introductory chapters, I realized they were writing about how wheat is processed today and how horrible it actually is for us consumers.

An excerpt from the intro section Overeating Sugar and Processed Foods: "Since Roman times, bakers have been aware that flour stored for a few months becomes whiter and has improved baking qualities. But storage time increases manufacturing costs. Around the beginning of the twentieth century, millers discovered they could get these same effects instantly by blowing nitrogen trichloride (Agene) or chlorine gas into the flour as it descended the chute into bags. Agene was used for forty-one years, but discontinued after a 1945 study showed that dogs fed the treated flour developed hysteria. Chemical bleaching and maturing of flour continues in many places." 

This was surprising to me.

It's one of those cookbooks that isn't just a bunch of recipes, it's also a philosophy. First off, it's a Mennonite Community Cookbook. Secondly, they don't like all these processed, packaged foods.  Thirdly, it's about keeping meals simple and nutritional. I can get behind that. The main idea is to ensure that there's enough food for everyone in the world; we can help by being less wasteful.

It never would have occurred to me that a religion would have an opinion about such a thing, but it does make sense. The web site for the book flat-out says: "...it addressed the concern that North American [sic] were doing the opposite — consuming more and more food made up of wasteful calories and unnecessary packaging." These people were green before it was cool. :)

From the More-With-Less site:

• "Written to challenge North Americans to consume less so others could eat enough, the book has sold an astonishing 830,000 copies since its release in 1976."
• "A global food crisis in the early 1970s with food reserves at a “precarious low” created the impetus for More-with-Less. In the first chapter of her cookbook, Longacre writes that the “average North American uses five times as much grain per person yearly as does one of the two billion persons living in poor countries.”
• "Longacre wrote to MCC friends around the world asking for economical low-meat recipes that would help North Americans reduce consumption by eating less animal protein and fewer highly processed foods." 

The only down-side for me is that it's not very allergy-friendly. On the plus side though, if a dish is just vegetables, lentils, and a meat, then there's nothing I can't eat anyway. There are things I can substitute too--almond milk for regular milk, gluten-free flours for flour, flax-meal for eggs, etc.

On Amazon.com, it sells for $7 used. Not too bad for a whole philosophy...

Below Stairs--The Original Downton Abbey

I recently read the book Below Stairs: The Classic Kitchen Maid's Memoir That Inspired "Upstairs, Downstairs" and "Downton Abbey" by Margaret Powell. I didn't think I would find anything at all relatable in it, but it turns out there's much the author (a cook) has to say about food and nutrition! This Guinea Pig recognizes the importance of healthy food in your belly...

www.goodreads.com

True, she wrote about how they didn't wash hunted animals before eating for fear of losing the flavor and I seem to remember something about food getting infested with maggots. Nonetheless, Margaret the maid and cook was also appalled at the rise of processed food! Even though she goes to great lengths to explain just how much time and effort went into making food in those great manors, she believes 100% it tastes better and is better for us that the newfangled foods.

About processed foods: "Nowadays they are at their wits' end to put things on the market to put back the flavour into food, the flavour that's come out with freezing. But it can't be done. No one can delude me into thinking that it can be, but of course if you've not had it the old way you don't know the difference."

About the taste: "Even nowadays when you see an economic recipe and they say you can't tell the difference from the original, well probably you can't if you've never eaten the original, but if you have there's a vast difference. It's like using margarine instead of butter, the top of the milk instead of the cream, having cheaper cuts of meat instead of the best, and having frozen salmon instead of fresh salmon. None of it tastes the same."

An excerpt that makes me so thankful for potato chips: "Nowadays everybody buys potato crisps in bags or tins, but in those days they had to be done by hand. First of all you peeled the potatoes, then you got a clean tea cloth and laid it out full length on the table and sliced the potatoes by hand so thinly that when you held them up you could see right through them. They were like little rashers of wind. You laid each one separately on the cloth. Then you covered them up with another cloth until they dried. They you melted fat--lard, not dripping because that was too coloured...You melted a portion of that in a frying-pan, a very deep one, and when it was boiling and blue smoke came off, you dropped these crisps in, one by one, because if you dropped two in at a time they stuck together..."

Margaret spent time grating Parmesan cheese by hand, making all sauces and condiments from scratch (horseradish sauce, hollandaise, tartar, mayonnaise), and mincing beef through a sieve!

I also thought the following two quotes were profound.

This one because it reminds me to really care for people by showing and doing: "In fact, all my life in domestic service I've found that employers were always greatly concerned with your moral welfare. They couldn't have cared less about your physical welfare; so long as you were able to do the work, it didn't matter in the least to them whether you had back-ache, stomach-ache, or what ache, but anything to do with your morals they considered was their concern."

And this one to remind me that sometimes kids need to do things they don't want to and it's in their best interest (it's not always about mushy, gooey, feeling good feelings!): "But the great thing about school in those days was that we had to learn. I don't think you can beat learning; how to read and write, and how to do arithmetic. Those are the three things that anyone who has got to work for a living needs. We were forced to learn and I think children need to be forced. I don't believe in this business of 'if they don't want to do it, it won't do them any good'. It will do them good."

Two More Things We Should Be Eating...

A little while ago, when I was still regularly struggling with the Big D, my doc ran a bunch of blood work. The most notable deficiencies were vitamin D and Iron. I was thinking about this again recently because a friend's mom has been struggling with food intolerances and the like.

I thought it was worth saying that I noticed a ton of improvement on that front when I started taking vitamin D and a little bit of iron. My husband pointed out that vitamin D was supposed to be good for intestinal health! Lo and behold...

http://gardenofeaden.blogspot.com/2012/02/what-is-vitamin-d.html

It's not new news. In this 2007 article from Celiac.com, researchers found that "...vitamin D may have a key role in maintaining the intestinal mucosal barrier and the integrity of tight junctions". I don't know what tight junctions are, but I don't care. This article also stipulates that vitamin D deficiency could play a role in the development of Celiac Disease and that healthy levels of vitamin D could help prevent cancer.

Besides being necessary for the absorption of calcium, this Slate article mentions the link between healthy levels of vitamin D and the prevention of autoimmune diseases: "The potential role of vitamin D in forestalling other diseases, particularly autoimmune conditions such as multiple sclerosis, Type 1 diabetes, and rheumatoid arthritis, has generated widespread interest as well...Another study, published in the Lancet in 2001, concluded that children who were given vitamin D supplementation were less likely to develop Type 1 diabetes." Since I have Hashimoto's thyroiditis and my husband has Type 1 diabetes, this is important to me!

A fellow blogger with Crohn's Disease wrote about it here, saying, "...it can assist with lowering intestinal inflammation and possibly prevent cancer."

Anyway, vitamin D does all good things!

Sources of Vitamin D:

• The Sun
• Fatty Fish
• Cod Liver Oil

Now about iron...

This article about iron says that "Chronic malabsorption can contribute to iron depletion and deficiency by limiting dietary iron absorption or by contributing to intestinal blood loss. Most iron is absorbed in the small intestines. Gastrointestinal disorders that result in inflammation of the small intestine may result in diarrhea, poor absorption of dietary iron, and iron depletion".

Basically they're saying if you have intestinal problems and are having diarrhea--you are probably having trouble absorbing iron and other nutrients. Too much iron is also a problem; it's a fine line: "Symptoms of iron overload include fatigue, vomiting, diarrhea, headache, irritability, heart disease, and joint problems."

Sources of Iron:

• Meat
• Beans
• Spinach & Collard Greens

Eat up.

A Guilty Confession & An Enlightening Appointment

Today was a bad day and a good day.

It's a bad day because of the aforementioned Guilty Confession. Ever since I tasted those Snickers at Halloween (yes, to cope with a miscarriage, but still...) I have been heading down a slippery slope. ;) The holidays presented a lot of wonderful opportunities to eat cheese and eat cheese I did. I haven't had cheese (or any milk products at all, to my knowledge) for about a year, year and a half. There is this awesome Camembert made in Fort Collins called Mouco Camembert that is a great weakness of mine. If you do eat cheese, you should try it. I also really love sharp white cheddar.

To be brief, eating cheese was a bad decision and I'm still suffering the consequences. I will remind myself of that next time I'm tempted. Tasty Cheese VS. Sour Tummy. Based on this brief, unintentional experiment I'm thinking that milk is harder on me than even wheat.

Today was a good day because I saw an OB who specializes in endocrine issues and pregnancy. She is internationally renowned but very humble. In the course of our detailed appointment, she drew me this:

Here's a summary of my super-encouraging appointment: 

• She was encouraging--she reminded me repeatedly that miscarriages happen in 1 out of 3 pregnancies and also that 1 in 20 women has Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. 
• I asked if she had heard of patient's with Hashimoto's who had had successful pregnancies. Answer--THOUSANDS. She recognized that I was an 'auto-immune girl' as she put it, but she didn't think it would hurt my chances at conceiving.
• She suspects, based on my history, that my initial thyroid problems were simply post-partum thyroiditis, a maybe-temporary thyroid condition where you go hyper and hypo and then finally normalize after having a baby.
• Because I was over-treated, I basically wasn't guided through post-partum thyroiditis in the best way. I.E., good treatment might have resulted in me not relying on taking a pill forever and ever.
• She checked my TPO antibodies and pointed out that they were in normal range still, which further confirmed in her mind that I might not need thyroid medication long term. !!!! 
• TPO anti-bodies can actually attack a baby in the first trimester and kill it, but it doesn't seem like that's the case since my anti-bodies are so low.
• She advised that I take thyroid medication through another pregnancy and then wean off of it to see if my thyroid takes back over. 

More importantly, she said she has high hopes that we will be able to have another baby. Only time will tell....

Praise God for the Hope and Encouragement of today.

Do You Hear What I Hear?

Things have been busy lately, as I'm sure they have for all of us. Instead of writing distinct posts, I'm going to bullet-list it tonight.

kids-ent.com

•  The Horror Story of My Ear

Yesterday I stuck a Q-Tip in my ear and experienced excruciating pain, but noticed no damage. I could still hear, there was no blood, and there was no pain. That evening, however, I noticed dried blood on my earlobe and followed the trail back into my ear. Suffice to say I was freaked out. I woke my husband from a dead sleep because THERE WAS BLOOD COMING FROM MY EAR. He was not amused. Following is an abridged transcript from the doctor's office:

Receptionist: "Hi! Are you Nichole?"
Me: "Yep, I have an appointment at two."
Receptionist: "Okay...I'm sorry I laughed at you on the phone."
Me: "It's okay, I'm laughing right now."

Doctor (looking in my ear): "Well....there's definitely blood. Oh! A lot of blood. I think you ruptured your ear drum."

After this, she sticks a strange ear-machine into my ear that hums, vibrates, and tells her important things about the pressure in my ear. Apparently the machine tells her my ear drum is not ruptured.

Me: "Well...where is the bleeding coming from?"
Doctor: "I don't know. Let's treat you like you have a lot of ear wax and rinse your ears out." 

Thus followed a strange experience in which a virtual stranger shot pressurized streams of water into my ear, sucked it back out (simultaneously! A miracle of technology.), and laughed while I attempted to maintain my equilibrium. Once cleared of blood, it was clear I had just scratched myself. !!!!!

• Apparently Tinnitus (Ringing in the Ears) Can Be Linked to Hypothyroidism

This is important to me because I have had ringing in my ears for awhile. Not debilitating ringing, just a kind of high pitched sound I only notice when it's very quiet. This article from the New York Times was posted by a Facebook friend; it just talks about tinnitus generally. Another article is just plain called "Your Thyroid Can Make Your Ears Ring!" and says: "Tinnitus is actually a common effect of thyroid dysfunction. A lot of people with this condition get a ringing in their ears." This was news to me.

• Men's Health Recently Wrote A Worm Article!

Remember when I had worms? Turns out I should have kept them. The blastocyst parasite was bad, but lots of people are thinking worms are GOOD! Something about having a colony of worms in your gut (no joke) can help people with autoimmune conditions. Read it here. Some remain unconvinced, but "the chief benefit, the proponents of helminthic therapy claim, is an optimized immune system—one that parasitic worms help train, exercise, and prevent from going haywire by way of a variety of dampening mechanisms and secreted compounds that researchers are just beginning to identify."

Ears, ringing, and worms, oh, my!

Comments on How Cruel Movies Are To Expectant Women

Last time I was pregnant with my son, the final installment of the Twilight series came out. In which, you recall, a vampire baby clawed it's way out of Bella's previously unblemished, alabaster tummy. I tried not to draw comparisons but since I was nine months pregnant it was a totally futile effort.

I borrowed the book from a co-worker. Upon returning it, I asked why she didn't warn me. She didn't want to ruin it for me.

I was not amused. 

These last couple months when I was pregnant and also when I wasn't so pregnant, I was watching The Walking Dead and Ridley Scott's Alien movies. Poor choice, Nicky, poor choice.

In a recent episode of The Walking Dead a pregnant lady pondered whether her baby, if stillborn, would become a zombie inside of her and eat her from the inside out.

!!!!!!!

I can't stop thinking about this. Surely her baby will be born alive, but if, if her baby dies there be a ZOMBIE BABY. And it would be surrounded my yummy, alive, pulsating flesh. And it would eat it's way out. Joyfully (Sadly? Kinda wanted to see that...) this didn't happen.


In the Aliens sequel Prometheus, a lady had an alien implanted into her uterus and then decided to have a do-it-yourself C-Section. Having had a c-section, I can say that it wasn't accurate at all (there are layers of muscle and fat to get through, people!), but nonetheless the image stays with me. Seconds before her uterus explodes apart via alien, a robot surgeon pulls an alien squid from her belly. "Ma-ma!"

http://geekleagueofamerica.com/2012/07/05/idiot-theater-employee-spoils-prometheus-for-moviegoer/

After her impromptu surgery, Noomi Rapace initially wanders around as if in pain, but then she just suits up and runs around the creepy alien planet. I am not a doctor (Speak up if you are!) but I am fairly sure her staples would come out.

Surely, whatever happens in a real pregnancy has got to be better than what pop culture is putting into our brains. :)

In Praise of My Daughter

In light of having miscarriages, I have been overwhelmed with thankfulness for my two kiddos. A few weeks ago I was playing with my daughter and I suddenly got very emotional. I told her how thankful I was that she was her and I started crying, but more out of thankfulness than sadness. She's just a miracle! At first, she thought my crying grimace was laughter and asked, "Mom, it's funny?" and I told her it was kind of funny. Then she noticed the tears and she said, "Mom, don't be sad! It's okay, don't be sad." I just hugged her hard.

That girl is a miracle child and let me tell you why. 

When I had my last ultrasound and they told me it looked like the gestational sac was at least 50% abrupted. It reminded my of my pregnancy with my DD. At 11 weeks I started bleeding pretty heavily. My DH and I called my mother-in-law to watch the toddler boy and we left in a hurry. Everyone was pretty somber and we assumed I would miscarry. At the midwive's office, however, we found that our little baby's heartbeat was still thumping away! Even though part of her placenta had abrupted and there was about a cup of blood hanging out in there with her, she was fine! It was a 'wait and see' sort of thing.

As time went on, the hemorrhage was absorbed. Fast forward through all that other horribleness to when she was born. She had/has an ear tag and sacral dimples. Initially because of the dimples they thought she had some degree of spina bifida. Cue the Mother Freakout. Over time, they have faded a little, she walks fine, and everyone calmed down a little bit. I looked into the ear tag and discovered that ear tags can also indicate a congenital defect-specifically kidney, urinary tract problems, and even hearing loss.

Then there's the fact that I was probably having some sort of thyroid problems during her pregnancy, I just didn't know about it. This article is flat-out entitled: Thyroid Disease Raises Risk For Birth Defects. "Twenty-one babies (18 percent) had birth defects, including problems in the cardiac, renal and central nervous systems and other disorders such as sunken chest, extra fingers, cleft lip and palate, and ear deformities. Two fetuses died before being delivered."

Another page, Thyroid Disease and Pregnancy, says that "... recent studies have suggested that mild brain developmental abnormalities may be present in children born to women who had mild untreated hypothyroidism during pregnancy."

So, my daughter might have had a degree of spina bifida (like a tethered spine), might have had kidney problems, and she might have had impaired brain development.

She doesn't.

I think God probably has a lot to do with that.

"For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb."

-Psalm 139:13 

Sometimes It Rains

I have debated and debated about writing a post about this. So the compromise I made with myself is that I would write it, because sometimes that's cathartic, and sometime when it's farther away from the present I can post it. Now it's only a month away, but it turns out that's enough time for me. I started this blog to process my health concerns and chronicle the things I try to do to help myself out. This is important to me, definitely is affected by my health and affects my health. So I'm writing about it. :)

I have posted before about how excited I am to try to have another kiddo, to try to have a VBAC and in that way conquer my c-section.

The hubs and I recently decided it would be okay to grow our family. I had all my labs done, talked to my doctor, and felt as sure as I could that my body was healthy! We got pregnant right away and promptly had a miscarriage. I think it's because I was unknowingly taking an abortifacient (you know, ones that can cause abortions) herb in my multi-vitamin, but it doesn't really matter.

We tried again right away and got pregnant again! Only at my eight week ultrasound, they said there was no heartbeat and to expect a miscarriage. It was incredibly awkward and horrible because a) there was a student ultrasound tech there who clearly didn't get it at first and b) they knew that something was wrong before I did. "We just need to take more pictures." "Um....let me go get the doctor so they can talk to you." Sigh. In the span of three months, I've been pregnant twice and disappointed twice.

I read the ultrasound report and it turns out that the egg sac was 'enlarged'. I guess that can be an indicator of genetic defects. It was clear that there was a hemorrhage around the egg sac, so it was pretty clear that Baby had already....become unstuck.

The thing about miscarriages is that, for me at least, it doesn't take that much time to mentally move on. What really bites is that the whole thing is long, drawn-out process. I haven't ever really considered it before, but Readers, a miscarriage takes TIME. Weeks, days, horribly long minutes.

So, one day you're thinking about what's for dinner and the next morning you're reminded that you are, in fact, having a miscarriage. And it last and lasts and, lest we forget, it really, really hurts. In my opinion, it was worse than my early stages of labor. My theory is that with labor there's a baby coming! So it hurts less. With miscarriage there's nothing coming! Yay! So it hurts more.

The other thing that made this particular miscarriage less than enjoyable was the absence (due to work obligations) of my husband. Gah.

I know how lucky I am to have the kids I have. The disappointment I felt is nothing compared to the sadness and disappointment I now imagine women who have been trying for years must feel. My kids were a bright reminder of the joy I already have.

Largely, the last two weeks, I haven't been eating as I normally would. I have succumbed to a raging desire for Snickers (technically wheat free) and Pillsbury frosting (which is mostly made of corn, processed corn, and more processed corn, all with different names). I just needed to confess. I have been trying to eat salads in the futile hope it balances out the nasty processed food I am indulging in.:D

I am concerned that the reason I haven't had another successful pregnancy so far is because of my thyroid or because of the weird autoimmune processes that are probably going on behind the scenes. But I will probably never know that. The University Hospital Center for Midwifery in Denver staff has been extremely supportive and wonderful. They aren't worried about the miscarriages right now because there's no reason to assume something besides regular ol' miscarrying is going on. One of my nurse midwives is actually pregnant right now, but she felt it might be helpful to tell me that she has had three miscarriages and three children. That's so amazing and encouraging! I can't tell you how I love to hear miscarriage stories because a) lots of women who have miscarriages go on to have children and b) women who have miscarriages survive and move on and are content.

I don't know why these things happen, but I do believe that God uses horrible things like this to refine us and help us become more compassionate, Christ-like believers. There is purpose in pain.

"See, I have refined you, though not as silver; 

 I have tested you in the furnace of affliction. For my own sake, for my own sake, I do this.
    How can I let myself be defamed?
    I will not yield my glory to another."

Isaiah 48: 10-11

Pushed: The Painful Truth About Childbirth & Modern Maternity Care

This is a post I wrote long ago, when I was writing up my birth stories. I have long meant to publish it, but got distracted by the intense debates between the author of this book, Pushed, and some folks in the Interweb world who are staunchly against home birth.

My review--Pushed is a good read. It's a sort of expose about how obstetrics works today and I appreciate the Jennifer Block's candor.

If you are at all interested in childbirth and have often wondered why the hell a woman would choose a home birth, this is one of those reads that will explain. Alongside Ricky Lake's documentary, this book is a sort of treatise about what needs to be fixed about the baby-delivering system we have in place today. The main problem appears to be that instead of women just laboring however they labor and having their babies (with intervention being for emergencies), hospital staff are worried about time constraints, convenience, and of course, how much insurance will cover. It's less about the woman and the baby and more about 'gettin' 'er done'.

Here are some of my favorite quotes:

"In posh Livingston, New Jersey, physicians say that virtually all of their patients receive Pitocin to either induce or augment labor. 'Once you're admitted, my feeling is that we should be advancing our cause,' one physician there told me."

"It's convenience for the physician mainly, but convenience also for patients," says Simpson. "And absent any data to tell them that it's not OK, they say, 'Well, maybe I'll have my baby this day or that day.' I firmly believe that mothers are not informed enough to know that this is not a good idea, and that any woman who has the right information would not want to have her baby induced." Inducing tends to create longer, more difficult, more painful labors in general, and it ups a woman's chance of C-section by two to three times." (This is from a doctor who isn't so enthused about the baby-on-demand method of delivery.)


"With induction, doctors don't need to wait for their patients to go into spontaneous labor, says Simpson, which 'is not in their best interest. Think about it from a physician's perspective,' she says. 'Let's say you have a very busy practice, and you're trying to have a quality of life, maybe you've got a young family, you don't want to be running out every night to deliver a baby, or not coming home in time for dinner, missing everything that your child is doing. So what happens is you try to get all the births in between 9 and 5, and to do that, you have o make sure nobody goes into spontaneous labor; and to make sure of that, you have to induce them all early. Or let's say this is the day you have to be on call, it's best then for you to induce three or four people on that day because you can get them all done at once. Those three or four people aren't going to call you on the weekend, they're not going to call you in the middle of the night, they're not going to interrupt your office hours, they're not going to give birth any time that's inconvenient."

You should probably read it. 

Fear Is Like A Mouse

I read a book once that described all the emotions that could slowly tear you apart inside as animals. Fear was a scurrying mouse, taking small bites out of things and nibbling away at your confidence.

http://news.discovery.com/animals/mice-stem-cells-101209.html

I think fear hurts us in so many ways. It prevents us from taking risks, from fully enjoying ourselves, from doing things that might hurt. This post was originally supposed to be about fear of childbirth and how it affects childbirth, but I feel like there's so much more to say. The trick is figuring out how to let mind prevail over matter. Easier said than done, right?

In this article, women who were scared of giving birth ended up spending more time in labor. What a great irony. "The study also found that mothers who feared childbirth were also more likely than unafraid women to need an emergency C-section (11% versus 7%) or assistance with instruments such as forceps for vaginal delivery (17.0% versus 11%). Overall, about a quarter of women who feared childbirth delivered without any obstetric interventions, compared with nearly 45% of women who were not afraid."

Fear also produces chemical and physiological changes in our bodies: “Mental stress is associated with physiological arousal and release of stress hormones. During labor, high levels of stress hormones may weaken uterine contractility and thereby prolong labor in women with fear of childbirth."

So let's stop psyching ourselves out, right? Let's do some yoga, spend some time with no distractions, let's journal and calm our minds so that we are not so afraid.

Anyway, I feel like I can take this information and apply it to my life, aside from childbirth. I think fear generally makes things worse. We are paralyzed and guarded instead of forthcoming and open. I guess the whole point of this post is that I need to be less afraid and more willing to really live life, whatever it has to offer.

The Evolution of My Medical Mind

A long, long time ago I wrote a post about the book Your Medical Mind that I heard on NPR: I Heard My Savior On NPR.

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/09/books/review/your-medical-mind-by-jerome-groopman-and-pamela-hartzband-book-review.html

My post was mostly about how these doctors admitted that people should be treated on an individual basis, not by numbers and rules set up arbitrarily by a focus group. They also spoke about how we as individuals respond to medical professionals. Some people are more apt to do whatever a doctor says,without questioning. Others are skeptical of everything. And some people fall somewhere in the middle.

The New York Times review explains it like this: "Groopman and Hartzband explore two sets of biases that affect patient decisions. We can be minimalists, preferring to do as little as possible, or maximalists who aggressively pursue treatment. We can be technology enthusiasts, seeking the newest drugs or procedures, or naturalists who believe the body can cure itself, perhaps with the aid of spiritual and plant-based remedies. Of course, these orientations interact..."

I have been thinking about this lately because over the last three years I've gone from someone who would indeed do whatever a doctor suggested to someone who is basically just frustrated with the seemingly god-like mentality of many doctors.

Initially when I was experiencing mind-numbing lethargy and horrible joint pain and swelling, I went to the doctor who a) put me on a dose of thyroid medication about four times what it should have been and b) who freaked out and basically told me my liver was crapping out. In the end, I went into his office two times complaining of chest pain and weight loss (because the dose was so high I was actually becoming hyper-thyroid). He told me to stay on that dose so he could see how my thyroid levels were after taking it for a month. In the end I was 25-30 pounds lighter, I twitched a lot, and he was basically glad to see me move to another city. Great work, Doc.

Aside from my personal experience with doctors basically having no idea what's wrong with me, I keep hearing anecdotal stories that are just plain frustrating. The evidence ranges from doctors in the 70s claiming a certain anti-nasuea drug was perfectly safe (when in fact in caused babies to be born without all their limbs) to doctors declaring a whole family of kids strep-free, when a second test revealed that they all did have strep.

My friend who recently had a baby was told at a check-up that she could take a drug for her nausea and that it was perfectly safe. The knowledge that this happens all the time, that drugs are 'safe' until suddenly they're not safe at all, kept her from taking it.

I saw an ad on TV calling for all those who had ever taken the anti-acne drug Acutane, because apparently people who have taken it now have colon problems, even to the point of having their colon removed. Now, people, I remember very clearly in high school knowing several people on that drug and even being offered that drug myself. The dermatologist told me it was safe, it was an option for acne. I guess at the time it hadn't been tested enough to show that after taking Acutane, you might have to poop in a bag for the rest of your life?

Thus, I have become someone who did do what the doctor ordered and it ended up hurting me. So I have gone from a trusting little lady to one who is now basically on guard with medical professionals. Sad day.

How has your medical mind evolved over the years?

Just The Facts, Ma'am

There's been a lot about genetically modified (GM) stuff in the news lately. I went on a search for studies about genetically modified crops recently. I'm a little freaked out by how much we humans are playing God. I don't think it's going to end well for us.

To be fair, there are a lot of studies out there about how safe GM foods are. There are also a lot of critics. On the other side, there are studies showing how unsafe GM foods are and there are also a lot of critics of those studies. So I just did some reading of my own.

http://www.treehugger.com/organic-beauty/arguments-against-gmos-and-industrial-agriculture.html

 There are oodles of studies that 'prove' that GM foods are safe.

This study's conclusion: "The genetically modified drought-resistant wheat T349 was substantially equivalent to parental wheat in the effects on immune organs and immunologic functions of mice, and it didn't show immunotoxicity."

And this one: "Compared with rats fed the non-GM control diet, some statistically significant differences were observed in rats fed the 3Ø5423×40-3-2 diet. However the differences were not considered treatment-related and commonly fell within the normal ranges of the control group consuming the commercial diet. These results demonstrated that the GM soybean 3Ø5423×40-3-2 is as safe as non-GM soybeans." This seems weird to me ("differences"?), but okay.

This one actually has something good to say about GM soy milk: "GM soy milk with or without probiotic-fermentation can improve hypercholesterolemia and reduce the risk of atherosclerosis, and is considered substantially equivalent to non-GM soy milk in terms of these bioactive functions."

And another: "The results demonstrated that BT-38 maize is as safe as conventional non-GM maize."

Another one that bothers me: "No statistically significant differences were found in relative organ weights of rats within groups but there were some minimal histopathological changes in liver and kidney."  I am so glad the writer's of this study were honest and included this information because it is significant to me.

Then there are the studies and articles that deem GM foods not so safe.

This particular study I thought did a great job of wording exactly what I'm worried about: "As genetically modified (GM) foods are starting to intrude in our diet concerns have been expressed regarding GM food safety. These concerns as well as the limitations of the procedures followed in the evaluation of their safety are presented. Animal toxicity studies with certain GM foods have shown that they may toxically affect several organs and systems. The review of these studies should not be conducted separately for each GM food, but according to the effects exerted on certain organs it may help us create a better picture of the possible health effects on human beings. The results of most studies with GM foods indicate that they may cause some common toxic effects such as hepatic, pancreatic, renal, or reproductive effects and may alter the hematological, biochemical, and immunologic parameters. However, many years of research with animals and clinical trials are required for this assessment. The use of recombinant GH or its expression in animals should be re-examined since it has been shown that it increases IGF-1 which may promote cancer."

GM crops affect us externally too. Huff Post has a recent article about how GM crops have led to pesticide resistant pests, which necessitates more pesticide usage. Yummy in my tummy.

The latest study, of course subject to a lot of scrutiny and picking apart (not necessarily a bad thing) concluded that GM foods do hurt rats, and hurt them quite a lot. The study ran for 200 days, about the lifespan of a rat but "Historically, biotech companies have proved the safety of GM crops based on trials involving feeding rats for a period of 90 days." What might be seen as thoroughness by some has also been listed among the problems with the study. One writer basically said that all rats would get cancer by the time they were old.

Another quote from an article about this study: "The world’s best-selling weedkiller, and a genetically modified maize resistant to it, can cause tumours, multiple organ damage and lead to premature death, new research published today reveals."

More: "In the first ever study to examine the long-term effects of Monsanto’s Roundup weedkiller, or the NK603 Roundup-resistant GM maize also developed by Monsanto, scientists found that rats exposed to even the smallest amounts, developed mammary tumours and severe liver and kidney damage as early as four months in males, and seven months for females, compared with 23 and 14 months respectively for a control group. 'This research shows an extraordinary number of tumours developing earlier and more aggressively - particularly in female animals. I am shocked by the extreme negative health impacts,' said Dr Michael Antoniou, molecular biologist at King’s College London, and a member of CRIIGEN, the independent scientific council which supported the research."

Ultimately, no matter what all the studies say, here is what's bothering me. I can admit that in the end we might really and truly prove that GM products are safe. But the choice to avoid them is being taken away from us. Products with GM foods aren't labeled and aren't required to go through any sort of extra testing (for pesticides maybe?) before being packaged and sold and eaten. The GM crops are mingling with the non-GM crops and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it.

I also feel like we humans are so prideful we forget that we are fallible. An article I found today is about how scientists in New Zealand created a brand new cow (after toying with it's DNA) who can produce 'hypo-allergenic' milk. The cow was also born without a tail, but they're not even sure why: "Scientists at AgResearch’s Ruakura campus were successful in greatly reducing the amount of beta-lactoglobulin (BLG), a milk whey protein that is not present in human breast milk and which can cause allergic reactions...To avoid the delay of two years before a natural lactation, the milk the scientists analyzed was from an induced lactation. They only obtained small quantities over a few days for these initial studies. They now want to breed from Daisy and determine the milk composition and yield from a natural lactation. They also want to investigate the origin of Daisy’s taillessness, a rare congenital disease in cows." Sounds great, but I fear stuff like this ends up on the market way before it's truly known what it will do to us.

Let's say we find in the end that GM foods aren't safe and we start dying prematurely and our cancer rates keep sky-rocketing, well, then too bad? It's in everything now? That sucks for us. I'm not sure about GM foods, so I'd rather wait and see, but it's getting harder and harder to avoid.

A Book About Hashimoto's...Or Beautiful Butterflies?

Okay, so recently I got a book on Inter-library Loan (-Insert Libraries Are Awesome Plug Here-) and this is my sum up of what I lovingly refer to as The Butterfly Book. It's called Hope for Hashimoto's by Dr. Alexander Haskell, N.D.

I can't say that this book was super amazing, but it was interesting. Mostly, I was confused by how this author recommended gradually adding back in iodine, but other natural-type practitioners recommend never ever taking iodine again (iodized salt, anyone?).

Part of the reason I was curious about this particular book is because Dr Haskell is one of those who believes that Hashimoto's can be 'reversed' and you don't have to take medication for life. Intriguing to me, to say the least. So, I gave it a try. Here's my summary and subsequent review. This will probably only be interesting for those who struggle with thyroid issues, but writing this helped me understand the info in the book. It's kind of a selfish blog post. :)

Introduction

*Even patients who hope to overcome Hashimoto's must start on some sort of synthetic hormone replacement. The medication will lower the body's levels of TSH, which is responsible for thyroid disease sufferers feeling crappy.

*When there's a lack of any nutrient the thyroid will struggle to make thyroid hormones and the pituitary will crank out more TSH, in the hopes (teehee) of encouraging the thyroid.

*This could lead to inflammation which, to sum up, is bad.

*We need Selenium to help reduce inflammation and protect our thyroid from the harmful effects of inflammation. Selenium deficiency has been associated with Hashimoto's.

*At least initially, someone with Hashimoto's should avoid iodine/iodide because it's believed that, thought necessary, iodine might actually raise TSH. The reason he gives for this increase is because TSH helps the body store iodine in tissues and so an initial increase in iodine will encourage the body to increase TSH in order to 'capture' the iodine. 

Phase 1 

*Goals of Phase 1 include lowering TSH to 1.0 or less, decreasing inflammation, getting the nutrients you need, and repairing thyroid damage.

*Eliminate iodine and iodide. It appears both a deficiency in iodine will increase TSH (since iodine is necessary to make thyroid hormones) and a surplus in iodine will increase TSH (since the body is trying to maxmize absorption).

*Iodine will be reintroduced when the number of thyroid antibodies (anti-TPO) go down.

*Recommended supplements: Selemiuwm (to help reduce imflammation), 400 mcg, Zinc Picolinate, 25-50 mcg, Iron, Vitamin A, and Essential Fatty Acids (recommended mixed EFA's from Biotics Research).

*The primary antioxidant studied in relation to Hashimoto's is glutathione. Glutathione can help reduce thyroid antibodies. Dr. H recommended taking N-Acetyl Cysteine (which is also apparently something people with Cystic Fibrosis take to break up mucus....).

*Drop the wheat.

*Take some time to think about whether or not your health symptoms could be caused by anything else, heavy metal poisoning, halogen saturation like fluoride, chronic infections, cholesterol, eating crappy foods, yeast infections, allergies, other hormone imbalances...

Phase II

*Goals of Phase 2 include reintroducing iodine into your diet, monitor antibodies, take a bunch of supplements, evaluate thyroid hormone production.

*Start taking liquid doses of iodine and iodide 25 mcg a day. Increase it gradually, every four days or so.

*Adjust thyroid medication dosage, hopefully to a lower dose. Monitor everything, TSH, free T4, free T3.

Phase III

*Gettin' off the meds.

*Check bound T3/T4 and free T3/T4 to see if everything is working well.

I am still intrigued. I can say that I took a multi-vitamin with lots of Iodine (too much maybe?) and I felt crappy. Anecdotally*, I would love to try to reduce my thyroid med dosage and see if I could fix what's going on. Realistically, I like the way I feel right now and I'm afraid to feel crappy again. Sigh.

*Auto-Correct says 'anecdotally' isn't a word. Screw Auto-Correct.
**The Internet says it is. ;)

Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3...

Sorry for the details and the delay. More test have been going down this past month to see how my little ol' gallbladder was doing.

These are the labs that I had drawn: liver enzymes, pancreatic function (metabolic panel), and white blood cell count.

They were all normal. So normal, and yet my doctor (well, someone who works in my main doctor's office) made everything sound like I might die. It was a very confusing conversation. She is very soft-spoken and reminded me a little of the boss from Office Space:

"Hi, this is Nicky."

"Nicky? Hi, this is Dr. So-and-so. We got your lab results back...yeah...and, uh...they all look...fine."

"Oh! So...?"

"Well, your numbers were all...uh...within range."

"Does that mean that some of them were borderline out-of-range?"

"Um...no. The enzymes and metabolic panel all look good. And your, uh, white blood cell count..."

She pauses and I died a little inside from frustration.

"...oh, your white cell count looks great too, not elevated at all."

"Okay."

Silence.

"If you want, we can keep an eye on everything and check again just to make sure."

"Um, what makes you say that? Just to be certain? Or is something worrying you?"

"Oh, no, I just wanted you to know that we could, for your peace of mind."

Nothing like a few bajillion pauses to introduce anxiety and doubt in my mind.

In addition to blood work, the other day I went to have my gallbladder ultra-sounded.

http://www.webmd.com/digestive-disorders/abdominal-ultrasound-showing-the-gallbladder

The woman who did my ultrasound was very forthcoming and flat-out told me she couldn't see anything wrong. I know she's not the official Radiologist/Voice-Of-God, but I was comforted by her opinion. She also let me know that my liver is gigantic. Not enlarged or anything bad, just...big. My secret deformity? Giant Liver. *Hangs head in shame.*

Ultrasound Tech Lady was very kind and concerned that I hadn't eaten breakfast. As someone who is most likely used to shoving aside mounds of adipose tissue (my husband's doctor-speak :) to find what she was looking for, I was absolutely svelte to her. After my appointment, she shoved a half-gallon cup of apple juice into my hand and looked tearful when I handed it to my son first. Moms are nothing if not sacrificial. Plus he was crying.

The good news is that the ultrasound officially came back fine! Dr. Office Space sounded absolutely baffled by my perfect results and, to be honest, I was too. The bad news is that I ultimately wasn't given a solid reason for the random pains I had been having. More on that in the future.

Obligatory Post: Thyroid & Gallbladder Sitting in A Tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G

So, this has been the question on my mind lately: Are thyroid disorders and gallbladder disorders related? 

http://uvahealth.com/services/diabetes-and-metabolism/conditions-treatments/11762

So I looked it up. I didn't find too terrible much.


The article "The Relationship Between The Thyroid and the Liver" was interesting because of this quote:

"There is also evidence that hypothyroidism may directly affect the liver structure or function. Hypothyroidism has been associated in a few case reports with cholestatic jaundice attributed to reduced bilirubin and bile excretion. In experimental hypothyroidism, the activity of bilirubin UDP‐glucuronyltransferase is decreased, resulting in a reduction in bilirubin excretion."

Also, the liver needs the hormones the thyroid produces to do it's job.

Another study, Association Between Thyroid Function And Gallbladder Disease, says:

"For decades, there has been a discussion, whether thyroid disorders could cause gallstone disease. Particularly, there are several explanations for a possible relation between hypothyroidism and gallstone disease. These explanations include the known link between thyroid failure and disturbances of lipid metabolism[1] that may consecutively lead to a change of the composition of the bile. Recent studies[2] also demonstrated low bile flow in hypothyroid subjects."

But the study concluded that only men were at a higher risk for having thyroid problems and gallbladder issues than women. This is possibly because women are at a higher risk for hypothyroidism and might be diagnosed sooner than men. So...in my opinion, kind of an inconclusive study.

From an e-zine article:

"While gallbladder disease could be the result of simply leading a sedentary lifestyle with lots of fast food, it also could be caused by hypothyroidism, a condition that means that the thyroid is not producing enough of the right thyroid hormones. Since these hormones affect many of your bodily processes, an insufficient amount affects everything from digestion and bowel movements to the speed of your ability to process thoughts."

The author lists 'gallbladder problems, including gallstones and delayed emptying' as a possible side-effect of hypothyroidism.

Chris Kesser, a guy I've quoted before who is an acupuncturist and practices integrative medicine, says that:

"...a sluggish gall bladder interferes with proper liver detoxification and prevents hormones from being cleared from the body, and hypothyroidism impairs GB function by reducing bile flow."

In any case, these are the only articles and quotes I felt worth publishing. There were a slew of web sites with info about the thyroid and gallbladder disease, but I didn't think they were very reputable. The few legitimate studies on the topic weren't super convincing. I will say that it does seem like having a shortage of thyroid hormones floating around appears to affect the amount of bile one has, which might be something!

You've Got Some Gall!

So something weird happened to me this past week. I had been having sharp pains in the my 'right quadrant', right under my rib cage, sometimes in my lower back. It occurred to me that it might be my gallbladder getting angry at me. Another voice (most likely the voice of Satan) chimed in to remind me that I was probably getting autoimmune hepatitis and would die shortly.

Once I had successfully told the Voice of Crazy to go f*** itself, I realized several factors that made it likely my gallbladder was the culprit:

*The pain was always after I ate and was worse after I ate something yummy, AKA something fatty.

*It got worse until it eventually gave me the Big D and nausea. Nausea is my worst enemy.

*My mother, my grandmother, and both my grandmother's sisters have all had gallbladder problems. Subsequently, they no longer have gallbladders. I don't know any more specifics (gallstones, blocked ducts, dysfunctional gallbladder, so many options...), except that my grandmother's gallstones were shaped like dice and she was glad to be rid of it.

*My mom and my grandma both warned me it would happen to me eventually.

http://iheartguts.com/gall-bladder

Anyway, I had been having these sharp pains on that side of my ribcage for....let's say four days or so. Then one fateful night, I decided to have avocado. For those of you who know things, you know that avocados are all fat. A healthy fat, but all fat nonetheless. Your gallbladder doesn't differentiate between healthy fat and bad fat. The pain got more and more frequent until, in the middle of a grocery store, I felt simultaneously like going to the bathroom and puking. Pleasant combo. Anyway, I booked it home. All I felt like doing was curling up in a ball on the bathroom floor. Eventually I started to feel better and I did myself some Googling.

Here is the most relevant info to myself:

"Chronic gallbladder disease (chronic cholecystitis) involves gallstones and mild inflammation. In such cases the gallbladder may become scarred and stiff. Symptoms of chronic gallbladder disease include the following:

        *Complaints of gas, nausea, and abdominal discomfort after meals; these are the most common symptoms, but they may be vague and difficult to distinguish from similar complaints in people who do not have gallbladder disease.
         *Chronic diarrhea (4 - 10 bowel movements every day for at least 3 months)."

I wish that someone had told me that gallbladder problems can cause chronic diarrhea. Maybe these last two years would have been a little easier if I had mentioned that to one of the many doctors I have seen. It also might explain why there were four incidences around when my daughter was born that I was inexplicably sick, with similar symptoms. I'm ashamed to admit this, but one time it was right after I binged on Cheetos and Oreos, both of which are chock-full of yummy fatty goodness. :)

Anecdotally, I have been testing this theory and there's no pain when I don't eat any fat. My good friend says my body has successfully taken all the fun out of eating. BUT I STILL HAVE SUGAR!

I go to the Doc today to see if I'm just a crazy hypochondriac or if I should go get an ultrasound. Sigh. Any personal, similar experiences with gallbladder issues would be appreciated.

About Face

The other day my husband said to me, "You never really hurt before, did you?" I keep thinking about these words. His observation must mean I'm a whiner and a hypochondriac now.

The answer is that I didn't hurt. Before my daughter's pregnancy, I had never really hurt. I have never broken a bone, gotten into an accident, or suffered from any chronic healthy problems.

The worst things that had happened to me physically were needing glasses and twisting my ankle now and then. I did split my bottom lip open three times in my childhood, but that ended up being a good thing because I'm convinced it has created a fuller, plumper bottom lip. :) My payment for free cosmetic enhancements was eating through a straw for a while.

As a result of my mostly pain-free life, I have been less than sympathetic with those around me who suffer. The biggest and best example is my husband. As a Type 1 Diabetic, the guy is perpetually feeling less than stellar. He is very good at managing his blood sugar levels, but even a slight increase or decrease from the norm causes discomfort.

I have asked what it feels like to be 'high' and to be 'low'. To be high feels heavy, sluggish, sick, tired, kind of like you're slogging through sand. This might be because his blood is literally filled with 'extra' sugar that he can't use for energy. To be low feels dizzy, light-headed, still tired, kind of dazed and loopy (but happy), and insatiably hungry. He tried to eat his hat once.

For the longest time, I had a sort of faux sympathy. Since making sure his blood sugar is on-line takes priority, he always checks if before anything and everything. Sometimes we were late because he had to eat, sometimes we couldn't be intimate because he was low, sometimes he was just plain cranky because his blood sugar was high.

Sometimes I was less than understanding. I like to think most of the time I understood that he could DIE or at least be admitted to the hospital without regulating his blood sugar, so I afforded him time to figure it out.

I wasn't understanding when there were Things To Be Done. I come from a very task-oriented, To-Do-List making, ball-breaking sort of family. We're German. When I wanted to Get Things Done and my husband just wanted to lay in bed and sleep off a low/high blood sugar, I wasn't as nice as I could have been.

In the last two years, God has really done a number on me. My daughter's no-so-great pregnancy, to an unwanted surgical birth, to semi-depression, to constant diarrhea, weight-loss, thyroid problems, autoimmune problems, doctors appointments...

I can't tell you how many conversations we've had where I'm saying, "So, is this how you feel when your blood sugar is high? It sucks! No wonder you just want to lay in bed all day. That's all I want to do." And guys, this wonderful husband of mine was already attuned to health woes. So instead of telling me just to buck up and get going, he has always let me take the time I needed to recuperate and rest. Now I make sure to afford him the same courtesy. Now I know how fragile we all are.

And remember the Big D!? One of my DH's favorite sayings is:

"Respect the pooping."

Now I get it!

Anyway, I hate to admit it, but if God's sole purpose for all this health-hardship (and I'm sure it's not, I'm sure there's much more going on...) is just to make me a more caring, sympathetic, and empathetic then....okay. He knows what He's doing.

From the devotional Streams In The Desert by L.B. Cowman:

"The Lord longs to be gracious to you...'Blessed are those who wait for him!' (Isa. 30:18). The Lord watches over us all in the difficult places, and He will not allow even one trial that is too much for us. He will use His refining fire to burn away our impurities...Do not grieve Him by doubting His love."

And:

"If only we would recognize every difficult situation as something God has chosen to prove His love to us, each obstacle would become a place of shelter and rest, and a demonstration to others of His inexpressible power."

Bump It Up

I'm a little late in posting this, but I got the results of a blood draw about a week and a half ago.

If you remember, the dessicated pig thyroid was good except that I was getting to much T3. This bums me out a lot. I had high hopes for piggie thyroid! On NatureThroid my TSH was great, about .89, but my T3 was too high and my T4 too low. I still had arthritis and my cycle was about 20 days. I think all you ladies reading this will agree that 20 days is way too short. My good friend and I agreed-that's time enough for one-half PMS and one-half period!

*Sigh.*

In any case, my doc agreed to switch me from NatureThroid back to 100 mcg of Tirosint to see if my numbers would all look a little better.

After six weeks, my TSH is at 3.2 (a little bit higher than it should be), my T3 is 3.1 (a little lower than it should be), and my T4 is at 1.56, which is about right.

We bumped up my dosage to 112 mcg of Tirosint and so far it's been good.

The only thing I'm frustrated with right now (besides unsuccessfully trying to stay off meds!) is that the first time I tried out Tirosint, probably 18 months ago now, 88 mcg was enough for my levels to be awesome. I felt awesome and I had no arthritis. It was shortly after I started on 88 mcg that I decided to try Chinese medicine.

In any case, my big question is why was 88 mcg good then, but not enough now?! Am I not absorbing the med well enough? Am I having some issue converting T4 (the stuff in the pill) to T3 (the form your body uses)? :/ I have no answers for this. Interestingly enough, the thyroid is where this conversion takes place, so some argue that a Hashimoto's thyroid (one beat down by your own body) isn't up to the task.

Other Applicable Updates:

Diarrhea: (I am laughing my ass off that I even wrote that. And for all the world to see.) Better, especially when I take pro-biotics and peppermint/ginger oil. Even better still when I don't eat insoluble fiber. The hardest thing is that I really, really like popcorn. That's, uh, pretty much 100% roughage. :)

Arthritis: Better with the increased dosage. On 100 mcg, I didn't have a lot of arthritis in my fingers or ankle, but for some reason my shoulder was freezing up and popping a lot. :( That's slowly been improving over the last week on the bigger dose. We'll see what happens in the long run.

By The Numbers

The Internet is a beautiful thing. I have been messing around with this blog, seeing who is reading and from where.

The breakdown of page views by COUNTRY is as follows:

United States-4,312
Russia-187
Germany-43
Canada-31
Latvia-18
Panama-15
Australia-14
Singapore-10
Brazil-9
Jersey-4

United Kingdom-2
China-1
Germany-1
India-1

Now, I'm not a math whiz. At all. I recently looked through a gigantic box of old report cards and homework and consistently I got a C or WORSE in math. Once I got a B+, it's true, but I'm mostly sure that was pity from the teacher and not capability or comprehension on my part. I also attempted a math problem I'd previously gotten wrong in the 3rd grade and I GOT IT WRONG AGAIN. I cried a little into my dairy-free, wheat-free chai.

I digress. I'm not interested in these numbers, per se, but let's be frank. RUSSIA?! After the U.S., the most people who have read my eclectic blog are people from Russia.

Who is reading this blog in Russia? What is happening? What are the search terms they used that brought them to me? I would have at least assumed there would be more people stumbling upon this blog from an English-speaking country, but a measly 2 people (unless it's one person who visited twice) from the U.K. have read this. I'm not counting Canada. (I'm joking, I'm joking...) Don't even get me started on Latvia. I'm not entirely sure where it is. :/

These are some of the search terms that brought people to my blog (take a moment to reflect on how creepy it is that Blogger can tell me this information):

• "masking clearvite taste"-I was no help on this one. My only advice in this department is that if you drink things fast enough it really doesn't matter what it tastes like. It's stopping to reflect on the taste that gets people into trouble.

• "pregnancy rash on face"-Again, I'm sure my blog proved a disappointment.

•  "guinea pig growth chart"-I can only assume someone is very concerned that their guinea pig is growing at the appropriate rate. These someones probably need more social interaction. ;) 

• "rheumatoid arthritis rash pictures tiny red dots"-Mm. This might the time to educate the masses in search terms, using AND/OR and quotation marks to refine things a little.

The post with the most page views is "This Shit Just Got Real" which I'm fairly sure is solely because I used the word "shit". I will heretofore conduct an experiment in which I use curse words in my post titles and see if it raises readership. Now you are ALL my Guinea Pigs! Bwahaha!

All About Babies Part IV, What I Want

So, it might be clear after my birth stories that I was less than enthused with how my second 'birth' went. I wish it could have been different, but it is true, I have a wonderful little girl just the same. If we do have kids again, this post is about what I want.

An intermission before the actual post. I have been keeping up with the crazy home birth vs. hospital debates [see below for links] and there's been a lot of mean things said. By everyone. One comment maligned home birth moms for wanting a 'perfect birth', an unattainable ideal that is just 'silly'. Well, I think we all want a 'perfect birth' and I think we should all hope for that. Reality is that sometimes it won't be perfect, but isn't life all about hoping and striving for those perfections?

Anyway, everyone has an opinion, everyone has emotional ties, and everyone interprets the statistics differently. I don't really care. This is my blog and this about what I want. :)

• I want to have a VBAC.

To reiterate, a c-section compared to a vaginal birth sucked ass. The end. 

• I want to deliver with VBAC-friendly medical staff.

I am frustrated with doctors and hospitals that pay lip service to VBACs or avoiding inductions and then switch 'sides' near the end of pregnancy. Not cool. That's not supportive, encouraging, or even honest. The goal would be to find someone trustworthy whose opinion I could bank on.

• I want a doula

Lots of statistics point to a doulas presence drastically reducing the rate of c-sections and need for pain interventions. Sign me up.  Information on doulas (and the good they can do for you) from DONA International.

• I want as few interventions as possible.

This one scares me a little because I did have an epidural with my son. I could still feel my legs and some pain on my side, but I couldn't feel pain in my uterus, where it counts!

The reason I wouldn't want a lot of pain medication and 'intervention' is because your likelihood of having a repeat Cesarean goes up as you get induced, epidurals, etc. An example: Early Epidural Double C-Section Risk After Induction.

Plus, with DS, I had some sort of narcotic drug to help with the pain and it only made me dizzy and nauseous. That's not what I had in mind.

• I want to eat my placenta.

I would totally be that weirdo. A friend's wife did that after her VBAC and it was the first I'd ever heard of it. Since then, crazy people in Hollywood have done it. I would do it just on the off chance it does help with post-partum depression. I would especially do it if I had a repeat Cesarean section. Fruit of the Womb does placenta encapsulation in Colorado.

As a Certified Nurse Midwive I talked to recently told me, there's not enough evidence one way or the other on this one. People think it might help 'replenish' the mom's energy and stave off depression, but there's no proof that it does. Here's a link to one mom who ate her placenta (it still sounds gross) but wishes she hadn't: I Regret Eating My Placenta. Anyway, that's why I say I'd do it on the off chance. :)

• I want to feel empowered.

I just want to feel capable of having a baby out my hoo-ha again. :) Having my son affirmed that I was a confident, capable person and then having a section with my daughter kind of took away some confidence and self-assurance. That's how it was for me.

Current Crazy Debate (In Order of Publication):

Home Birth: Increasingly Popular, But Dangerous by Michelle Goldberg
How To Scare Women by Jennifer Block
Michelle Goldberg Answers A Critic's Distortions of Her Home-birth Argument by Michelle Goldberg
Separating Evidence From Ideaology in the Homebirth Debate by Jennifer Block

A blog post about this debate: Smart Women Debate Homebirth

The Skeptical OB's (Dr. Amy Tuteur) Take: 
Jennifer Block: Whack-A-Mole Journalist 
Navel-Gazing Midwife Takes On Jennifer Block